There is often a realization that walks across my heart, stepping on all the nooks and crannies that hold every part of my testimony, my happiness, my fears and my pain.
It is the realization that the Atonement of my Savior and Friend, Jesus Christ, can work for my everyday life.
And yet, I feel like no matter how many difficulties I am faced with — large and small — this is a hard thing for me to remember. This realization can sometimes shock me so much that it brings me to my knees and fills my eyes with tears. How could I forget?
How could I possibly forget that my Savior not only gave up His life so I could repent of all my sins and return home clean and pure (which is kind of a big deal) but that He also suffered every pain known to man?
I so often clasp my hands in agony over my own struggles, forgetting that Christ clasped His own hands in agony over all the struggles of every person in the world — past, present and future.
I cry out asking my Father, “Why?”
“Make it stop,” I plead.
And, as I was reminded today in sacrament meeting during a talk, Jesus Christ was in so much pain as He was suffering for our every trial that He uttered something similar in the garden.
“Abba, Father, all things are possible unto thee; take away this cup from me: nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt.” (Mark 14:36)
No matter how afraid and in pain Christ was at that moment, He was still ready and willing to do — and take on — whatever His Father needed Him to.
If Christ was willing to do such a thing, I can be too.
I can be willing to accept that depression and anxiety are probably perfectly tailored trials that Heavenly Father has blessed (yes, you heard it right — blessed) me with.
I can be willing to accept that death is a part of this earthly life, and that each and every one of us will have to experience it for ourselves someday.
I can be willing to accept that growing up is hard to do.
And I have someone ready to hold my hand through it all at any given moment.
Because, in all reality, He is constantly by my side, no matter how dark my day is.
It is literally amazing that He has experienced the exact frustration we feel when we miss our train to get to work. It is amazing that He has been through each and every one of our heartbreaks. It is amazing that He has felt the same exact amount of despair as we have when experiencing unexplainable loss.
He has felt the weight of our every day.